Blue Monday

Well it’s Monday again so I thought it’d be great to do a blog on ‘feeling positive’.

I think that feeling on Sunday evening as another work week approaches is something most of us can relate to right? Sometimes its just a sad feeling that your fantastic weekend is drawing to a close. Maybe you have a bit of impostor syndrome at work and you’re worried about your work ahead? It may be that you’ve got something big and scary on in the week ahead that you’re not looking forward to. Or you’re already looking forward to next weekend?

Anyway, in this blog I’m going to look at some things that are easy and simple to do, feel more positive. I’ve taken some practices from tinybuddah.com and will explore them with you.

So we’re going to look at:

  • Focusing on self love – and no this isn’t something that teenage boys practice on their own 🙂
  • Listening to your inner child
  • Asking someone else for what you need
  • Participating in enjoyable activities

There are tonnes of things that could give us the Monday blues, the thing to remember is that you’re not alone in feeling like this. Also you don’t need to be suffering with depression or anxiety to feel like this, but I guess the thought process behind it can be very similar. So what do I mean by this? Well, often we have built something up in our mind to be bigger than it actually is. This then affects our thought process leading up to it. When we build these things up in our heads, we start to believe them as fact, when actually it’s just something that we have formulated based on how we are feeling and what we are experiencing at that time.

Focusing on self love

Now my wife Nicki and my niece Keira like to watch a programme called ‘Ru Paul’s Drag Race’ and on that show they say…

“If you can’t love yourself, how the hell you gonna love anyone else…”

Ru Paul

You can’t argue with that! But this is something I have really struggled with in my depression. You’ve heard of the saying “we are our own worst enemy”? In this modern world where we judge ourselves by perfection, by what we see on TV and in magazines, by all the filters on social media, we have to let go of the ‘perfectionist standards’. Those that we think are fantastic, amazing and perfection, all have their own issues. Everyone wears a mask at times.

So lets give ourselves a break and concentrate on all the good qualities we possess, i’m positive you have loads!

Listening to your inner child

Now what does this mean? Well it doesn’t mean we should all start acting childish running around putting toast in the dvd player and drawing on the walls.

Think about this, what does a child do when it’s happy? What does a child do when it’s sad? Kids tend to wear their emotions on their sleeve. You know whats going on in their heads. I’m not saying we should all do this (though it might be good from time to time), what I’m saying is that we should listen to our feelings, our inner child, and not keep it all bottled up inside. There are lots of positive outlets for our emotions. Another key issue I had was bottling things up and not dealing with what was affecting me.

It feels great to listen to my inner child and let my feelings out, even if they’re bad feelings, I feel better afterwards.

Asking someone else for what you need

I don’t know about you, but I’m quite a proud person, I don’t like asking for help. I think to myself, “other people have got their own things to worry about”, and I guess in an immature way I think it makes me look weak or stupid if I need help. Now I’ve been in counselling for 9 months now and I’m only really now starting to be able to change my opinion on this. After all I’ve spent most of my life feeling this way, it’s not going to change over night. But I can say that since I’ve been adopting this practice, of asking for others help, not only do things often get done in a better way than I could have done it on my own, but it feels great to engage with someone and admit you need help. Also, they are likely to ask for your help in the future, which also feels great. Win win.

Participate in enjoyable activities

Bit of an obvious one right? Well you’d think so, but when we are feeling low or pressured or stressed, it’s hard to think about anything else. We concentrate on the negative and don’t let anything else in, which results in feeling worse.

So take a break, you can always go back to the stressful thing later. Take some time out to get some head space. I like to take myself away for a 10-20 minute meditation, but it could be as simple as running a bath, ringing up a friend to see how they are, go the gym if you’re that way inclined, just do something that you enjoy. It’ll make you feel great and chances are you’ll come back to that stressful thing more resilient and may even have a different more positive take on it.

So to sum up, just take a little time out your day to try one of these things above and it doesn’t have to be on a Monday, just whenever you’re feeling a bit down and need a bit of positivity in your life, after all, only you can make the change 🙂

Take care of yourselves.

2 Replies to “Blue Monday”

  1. Mr Dave
    Great blog mate, as I said at footie last week, your basically in.my head and your blog saying what I have built up mate, so your doing all the hard work for me and I have pure respect and love for this.

    Jay : )

    1. Thats great of you to say Jay, this is exactly one of the reasons that I’m doing this, to help others so thanks for the feedback, much appreciated 🙂

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